Boys Need Role Models. Let’s Make Sure They Can Afford Them.

In a recent NYTimes article, Claire Cain Miller noted that most of the professionals in children’s lives are women–including 94% of childcare workers, 79% of K–12 teachers, and 69% of pediatricians (Miller, 2025, What Happens When Most of the Adults in Boys’ Lives Are Women). This means many boys and young men grow up with limited daily interaction with positive male role models. Without these real-life connections, kids often look to celebrities and athletes for inspiration, which can sometimes lead them down the wrong path.

But there’s one place where men are still very present and can make a huge difference: youth sports. About 60 million kids play organized sports in the U.S., and three out of four families have at least one child involved. And three-quarters of athletic coaches are men. This makes coaches natural, everyday mentors who can step up and fill that important role.

Our research, based on the nationally representative National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health shows just how powerful these relationships can be. In surveys of  8,000 young adults, nearly 3% said a coach or athletic director was their most important mentor growing up. That’s more than grandmothers, uncles, or even friends’ parents (Christensen et al., 2019). Those with coach mentor were much more likely to finish high school and go on to college. This was true even if they weren’t top students to begin with. It suggests that coaches aren’t just helping already successful kids; they’re actually changing lives, especially for those who might be struggling (Christensen et al., 2019). Coaches teach valuable life skills like setting goals, staying disciplined, and handling emotions and motivate young athletes to stay involved in sports long enough to truly benefit.

So, what’s the problem? Money. Youth sports are becoming incredibly expensive, and it’s pushing many families out. The average U.S. family spent over $1,000 on their child’s main sport last year, a nearly 50% jump since 2019 . This is partly because big investment firms are buying up sports facilities and tournaments, driving up costs to make a profit (Drape, 2025; Rhodes, 2024; see Drape, 2025, “Private Equity Is Turning Youth Sports Into an Industry,” The New York Times, https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/09/business/youth-sports-private-equity.html).

The result is a growing divide. According to the Aspen Institute’s Project Play, youth sports participation among kids aged 6–12 dropped from 45% in 2008 to just 37% in 2022 . Kids from homes earning over $100,000 are twice as likely to participate as those from homes earning less than $25,000. Our own research confirms this: kids with coach mentors are more likely to be White,  from higher-income families, and have two married parents.  It’s not just the direct fees. Many lower-income families face other hurdles like a lack of transportation to practices, fewer quality sports facilities in their neighborhoods, or even feeling unwelcome on teams. This isn’t just about missing out on a game; it’s about denying kids access to vital relationships and life lessons that can shape their future.

Compounding this crisis, public funding for youth sports and extracurriculars has been significantly curtailed. During the COVID-19 pandemic, many high schools faced budget cuts of 20% to 50%, leading to widespread concern that sports programs would be eliminated (Niehoff, 2020). Indeed, 13% of youth sports parents reported their community-based sports provider closed due to the pandemic, with another 12% merging with other organizations (Project Play, 2021). This follows a longer trend: local park and recreation spending plummeted by 21% from 2009 to 2013 after the Great Recession, and these departments are often targeted for large budget cuts when cities face fiscal pressures (NRPA, 2020). As a result, many communities have seen quality programming drop off, pushing more families toward expensive private clubs. Even at the collegiate level, dozens of NCAA Division I Olympic sports programs have been cut or consolidated due to financial pressures and new settlements, impacting roster spots and recruitment opportunities for aspiring athletes. These cuts represent lost opportunities not just for athletic development, but for the academic success and overall well-being of our youth (Rhodes, 2024).

To reverse this, there’s a need to reinvest in locally run, non-profit sports organizations like Pop Warner and Little League, which historically offered affordable pathways to participation. We also need to encourage civic-minded men to volunteer as coaches, directly addressing the shortage of male role models in our communities. Beyond funding, we need to empower our coaches and our kids. Mentoring organizations and schools should offer comprehensive, evidence-based training that explicitly emphasizes the mentoring aspect of coaching, including, teaching life skills like goal-setting, and fostering mental health awareness. Kids respond best to coaches who encourage them, and good coaching can prevent the alarming 35% annual dropout rate we see in youth sports.

Our policymakers must recognize the profound developmental value of extracurricular activities and actively counteract the negative impacts of sports commercialization and budget cuts. Equitable access to sports and high-quality coaching is not a luxury; it is a fundamental investment in the academic outcomes, social capital, resilience, and future flourishing of all young people.